Category: looking forward

I want to Remember

I want to remember each day as it comes,
That I am here for a reason
That my life is a precious gift,
That I should cherish it

I want to remember, the little moments that take my breath away,
Little moments that I recount at the end of each day,
Moments that make me smile,
Moments that I hold close to my heart

I want to remember that am here to enjoy my life,
To remember that life is too short,
To know there is no time for holding grudges,
Only time for finding things that make me happy

I want to remember that today is the only time I have,
That yesterday is gone, whatever happened is now in the past,
Tomorrow is only but a dream, a promise that I cannot be sure of,
This hour, this minute, this second, is what I have!

I want to remember this when am angry,
When am feeling down, when it is dark,
When I think that am at the end of the road,
I want to remember!

I want to remember so I can take it easy,
So, I can choose to smile,
To love and to laugh with an open heart
And to cherish this remembrance.

I hope you remember too!

Letters to my Future Husband #6

Hey lovely readers? Its that time again to write to the future Mr. Millie. I never knew that inspiration could take so long, but its here so lets hope he is reading and that it touches some part of his heart.

Dear [FH],
Hi honey, dear, darling, sweetheart and all the other sweet words I might choose to call you! I am Ok, just taking each day as it comes. Life is fine, not too much drama. I actually like my life right now and I hope it is headed in the right direction. The weather is kind of complicated. Somedays, the sun decides to come out and some others, its just plain cold. Today is kinda cold, actually my feet are freezing but I will be ok.

How are you?Is everything ok? I guess it is coz if it weren’t, you would have reported it. And if it isn’t, then I will pray and by tomorrow, everything will be better. Is it cold? Or maybe warm or hot where you are?I wish you could just tell me so I know what your life is like. Oh dear, I must admit that I miss you. Do you understand? You know I said the same thing in the last letter but I dont think you understand. I miss you so much. In a way that I cannot explain. But am ready to wait for you.

Sweerie, when the time comes for us to meet, I hope you will be ready. Ready to receive the best kind of love from me. The kind that sticks in the heart and remains there forever. I hope you will be ready to share your life with me. That is the reason why all human beings crave connection. We want to share our lives with someone else. That is what I want with you. To share our lives together. To know that someone notices and values my existence. That is is not all in vain. I am getting ready for all this and more and hope you are too.

I love you my baby and wish to see you soon.
Many hugs and kissess!
[FW]

Readers, I hope he listens to me and comes along very soon. Hold your breath and I’ll hold mine and when we let go, he will be here.

When things dont make sense

There are times when I just sit around and wonder which part of my life makes sense! I try to unravel many aspects of my life and I do not seem to find the kind of sense that am looking for. But, something happens, a call, a simple text, a kiss on the cheek, a hug, a comment on my blog and I remember what makes sense, LOVE. When everything else does not make sense, just try, try and remember those people you love and you will soon find some sense in your life!

If we went for Coffee Today

Tuesday:

Loved it, a little tired but doing well,
Hope you had a good day too,
Been long since we’ve talked.
Coffee tastes great and am happy that you are here.
I have missed doing something with you.
Its good to know that you took time to come,
Am grateful for you!

If we were to have coffee today, I would have such little to say.
Am just having a quiet time here.
In real life, its not that quiet. Driving lessons, time with in-laws, lots of walking around, stall at work.
Lots has been going on but over here am taking it easy.
Here, I choose to take it easy. I choose to enjoy time here and listen to the silence in the blogworld.
But tomorrow, it is a new day. Mid-week, Infact.Maybe some noise but not guaranteed.
Love you and it was fun having coffee with you!
Lets wait for Wednesday!

Scintilla #8: My Tribes

Throughout my young life, I have belonged to several tribes which I have often used to describe myself. This post explicates these tribes.
Prompt:
List the tribes you belong to: cultural, personal, literary, you get the drift. Talk about the experience of being in your element with your tribes.
Culturally, I belong to the Kikuyu tribe in Kenya. In our country, there are more that 42 tribes which are actually small groupings of people depending on the language they speak, their culture and where they came from historically. I love my tribe, no argument. However, in our country, politics have become a tribal affair. People hate each other just because one comes from a different tribe. In 2007, we had a general election and when a person from my tribe won, other tribes ganged up against the Kikuyu and this caused a lot of civil unrest. Meaning that people fought and people died. With such happenings, it has become more and more difficult to identify with my tribe. It is not that I am not proud of it, it is just that I do not want to be labelled as tribal. It has become very difficult to draw the line between identifying oneself and being tribal. Anyway, I was born a Kikuyu and always will be.
Personally, I like to attach myself to the optimism tribe. The tribe that looks at the glass half full instead of half empty. I have always known I belonged to this tribe but it has not always been easy attaching to my group. At times, I have been stressed, tearful, sad, lonely and abandoned my tribe. Let me tell you, it is like leaving you family and walking away. When these feelings attack me and all I can see is the negative, it is like am down with the flu. I feel suffocated, I cannot breathe. I know that I have to find my way back to my tribe. 
– 
There was a time in my life (not too long ago), that I belonged to the brokenhearted tribe. Then I joined the feel sorry for myself tribe. I have also at some point joined the loner tribe. But I always go back home. All these seem foreign to me and I can only pass through them as I find my way to my family. I love my tribe and I am proud to be a member of the optimism tribe.

Scintilla #7: Faith

Hi my peeps!I have missed you totally and completely. I did not write for Scintilla yesterday and am ok with that. But I also missed it. My week has has been good so far, just work and a magical night yesterday with someone special (my hands shook when I wrote that). Am grateful. And it is time to let you into my life a little more through Scintilla. Today its all about faith. 
Prompt: 2. Talk about an experience with faith, your own or someone else’s
 
Faith is defined as confidence or trust in a person or an entity. I just had to get that definition because some of the meanings we give to words are personal and do not necessarily reflect the well-known meaning. 
Am out of words when it comes to describing my faith but I have had experiences that proves that my belief in something bigger than me supports me as I go about life.  
I went to boarding school at 8 years of age. I am barely five feet now, so you can imagine how tiny I was at 8. I was so small, my classmates used to call me Millie tiny. I accepted it because I knew I was tiny, no doubt about it, no arguments. However, the problem was not with my body size, it was with my homesickness. 
I felt as if I was being tortured. Being away from my parents was so scary. I constantly told my mother that I did not want to go back to school. She said I would outgrow it and eventually I did but it took so much from me.
I started finding ways of attracting my parents attention. I started pretending to be sick. Even when I was actually sick, I pretended to be feeling really, really bad. This earned me trips home, many of them. My mother was getting tired of it and she knew it was more than just physical sickness. 
She took me to a counselor. I remember it was a woman. She talked to me. She told me that I could open up to her. That she would keep my secrets confidential. I told her everything. How I hated school, how I missed my parents, how I wanted to go home. She told me that my parents were doing it for me. That the school I went to was the best and all they wanted was for me to succeed. She spoke my language, I was a child and I felt understood. For once, someone took time to actually listen.
I remember, how she asked if I believed in God. I remember how she told me that God was always there for me, whenever I needed to talk. She told me that whenever I felt the urge to go home, I could just talk to him and ask for whatever I needed. Eventually, I believed her and I started praying. The pretense sickness ceased and it felt so good to have someone who always watched over me. I believed that he watched over my parents too and there was no need for me to go home and check on them myself. 
This is my faith. I believe in God. Not in an obnoxious kind of way but in a more personal, day by day way.He walks with me and I place my confidence and trust in Him.
A Stylish Little Lady

New baby, new beginnings and a recap of December

I know its been a really long time since I updated you on the goings on in my life. But here I am to do just that. I have to say that December was one of the busiest and most interesting months of last year for me.
First, my dearest cousin/sister (I call her my sister because our fathers are twins and so we are very close), gave birth to the most beautiful girl. This was on 5th and her name is Crystal. She is awesomely pretty and so loveable. That was the beginning of a great month.
Second, I started and quit a new job within the same month. I started on the 15th and quit on 21st after discovering that it was not what I was looking for. Nothing more to say on that. I then went to visit my parents for the entire Christmas time, had awesome fun and now am back to my normal life.
Did I even tell you that am single?? Don’t even get me started on that but I will you in as life continues to unfold.
Now there you have it, an update on what is happening in my life right now.
I think I forgot to mention that I am Happy!!!!!Have a great week ahead.
Love you!